The List – the hypothetical list of (usually famous) people that you would get a free pass from your spouse to cheat with. Usually the list is made up of people you don’t know, and will most likely never run into on a daily basis, therefore making it safe to assume it won’t happen. I’m assuming that is probably why the practice is so accepted among spouses.
For most people, their lists exist only in their head – a person added here and there over time, and some removed when they fall out of favor. “He’s/She’s on my list” is a phrase I’ve heard (and said) a few times while watching a movie or TV show. Or, conversely, “he’s off my list”. Some people’s lists are actually written down. Some even laminate their list, and carry it around in their wallet. The show Friends actually had an episode where Ross met one of the people on his list (Isabella Rosselini), but since she had recently been replaced on said list, Ross wasn’t able to “seal the deal”.
You can check out that video here…
It makes me laugh every time.
For the most part, these lists are reminders that we haven’t stopped being interested in the opposite sex just because we are married. Granted, the chances of meeting anyone from your list are slim-to-none. The chances of actually hooking up with them, even slimmer. And of course, the chances of your spouse actually looking the other way if it were to happen are the most slim of all.
My list has been re-written a few times in my head. And for me, it’s not just about a tumble in the sack – a few people on my list are people I just want to have dinner with – or spend the day sitting on the beach, drinks in hand, talking about life and love and the future. For example, Billy Joel is one of my very favorite musicians. He has been on my list forever. But I don’t want to sleep with him. I just want to talk to him. For a very long time. I think he would be so interesting – I love the way he writes his music/lyrics, and I assume he is just as fascinating to talk to in real life. I know that’s not really cheating, but I think it would hurt my husband’s feelings when I tell him he isn’t allowed to join Billy and me for our little rendezvous. And that would be just as bad in my book because I know his feelings would be hurt. Besides, who has a list of people they want to be friends with? Okay, I admit, I do. It includes P!nk, Jennifer Aniston and Sabrina Soto. There are many more on that list, but this isn’t about my imaginary BFF list!
So, anyway, my list is short. I have most of them on this Pinterest Board. I call that board “Men I Like to Look At”. And oh boy, do I ever!
High on my list is George Clooney.
He is charming and smart and funny and I know we would hit it off, well, because I am charming and funny and smart. He’s also beautiful. And all together, that makes him smoking hot.
Here are a few of my other favorites. Can you sense a pattern? Tall, dark, handsome, smoldering…
(okay, side note… doesn’t this picture almost look like he’s on the toilet?)
Ahhhh… yes, Anthony Carrino… that brings me back to the reason I am writing this post.
Yesterday, I drove an hour south to meet the cousins from HGTV’s Kitchen Cousins. Anthony Carrino and John Colanari were speaking at the Broward County Convention Center at the Home and Remodeling Show. I had convinced my 18 year old daughter to come with me, as my husband had to work. She doesn’t watch HGTV, so she had no idea who I was talking about when I ran around babbling about the Cousins being in town. Yes, I was like a like a 13 year old in my excitement. Tori got quite a kick out of seeing her usually low-key mom all amped up about meeting these guys!
As soon as we got there, I have to admit that I didn’t even walk around the rest of the show, I just made a beeline for the stage they would be on, and sat in the front seat about 30 minutes early. Yes, I’m a dork.
When John and Anthony came on stage, they were well spoken, funny and informative – first talking about how they started their business, and then getting onto TV as the Kitchen Cousins, then taking questions from the audience. I found myself completely tongue tied, and couldn’t get up the courage to ask a question. At one point, Anthony was literally an inch away from me when he walked over to give a woman behind me the microphone to ask her question. I had to restrain myself from reaching over to
bite grab touch him.
I was impressed that they seemed so down to earth, and not at all snooty. They are also much better looking in person, which I didn’t think possible. Anthony has this way about him, which I haven’t been able to put into words, that makes you want to adopt him into your group of friends. He’s kind of bashful, endearing… it makes you want to be his buddy – the kind you sit on a deck with, having some beers, on a warm summer night, talking about the old days in the neighborhood. Even my husband agrees that he and John seem like good guys to hang out with. And it was nice to see that it wasn’t just a vibe that was cultivated for their TV show, they seemed just that way in person too.
At the end of their presentation, they went over to a table to sign autographs and take pictures. I was finally able to ask them the two questions I had been trying to get out, and then took pictures of them with my daughter. She is now a big fan of them too, especially Anthony.
But here’s the thing about Lists… When you finally do meet someone that you have on your list, it makes you realize all that you have waiting at home for you. Not that it wasn’t terrific to meet Anthony in person, but it made me realize that he’s just a guy, no different that any one else that I could meet on the street. He might be good looking, and sexy, but no more than my husband. I found myself thinking that I would love it if they were our neighbors and could have them over for BBQ’s sometime, but that’s the extent of it.
On the other hand, my husband is tall, dark and handsome. Incredibly smart – brilliant actually. He’s funny, and laid back. Those dimples just kill me. He’s an amazing father to our kids. He’s kind and gentle. Every kid we know, loves him. Animals too. And he puts up with my crap, which is more than I can imagine that anyone on my “list” would do
So, although I can keep my list in my head, or even write it down and carry it in my wallet, I know that there isn’t a guy on earth that could ever compare to the man I promised to love for the rest of our lives.
Do you have a list? Is it written down somewhere, or do you just keep a running list in your head? Does your spouse have one too? Mine does – and it makes me super glad that Jessica Alba lives on the other coast. LOL!
Have a great day!
UPDATE: Edgar, my husband, read this post and thought I would be hurting John’s feelings since I didn’t say how awesome he is too… in my defense, I didn’t want to gloat too much about him since he is newly engaged. I feel a little bad fawning all over him – I’m pretty sure his fiancé wouldn’t like it. But, he was pretty awesome too – loved his sneakers.